Do I Fit In?

A Post by Emily Clos:

Do you ever feel like you don't fit in? Well unless you have absolutely everything going for you, and live in the middle of a field somewhere and have no way of ever socializing with others, chances are you have felt this way before. We all can agree that if someone were to ask the question: "Do you want to fit in with a group of murders and thieves?" You would most certianly answer "No." But if they asked: "Do you want to fit in with a bunch of really cool, popular, fashionable girls who have lots of friends?" You would undoubtedly be more hesitant to say "no" to that one. While some of us may feel it more than others, the reality is that we aren't always going to feel like we fit in, and usually becasue we actually DON'T fit in. This however is not always a bad thing. In the first scenario, (the murdererd and theives question) our immediate response would be "ummm no? I really DON'T want to fit in with a bunch of criminals". And we shouldn't. But in one of Jesus' sermons He said:

"Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? Likewise every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them." (Matthew 7:15-20)

When I read this passage though, I don't immediately think of the murders and thieves and people outwardly committing crimes. If that was what Jesus meant, I think He would have just wrote "Stay away from criminals" But no, Jesus said to beware! That we could be deceived or tricked! Tricked into thinking something bad, is actually something good. So now lets think back to our other question: Would we want to fit in with the trendy, cool girls? Of course we think we want to, but we need to use discernment (good judgement) before we long for that kind of friendship. Because these kind of girls, might not be the kind of friends God wants us to have. God puts many different people into our lives, but He doesn't intend for us to be best friends with all of them. Some of them He wants us to simply just show love towards. Once you become best friends with someone who isn't saved, it gets harder and harder to talk to them about God. And sooner or later we will become more like the world, than the world becoming like Christ. We can have some unsaved friends, yes, but I want to warn you about having all of your close friends not in the church! I used to long for friends when I was growing up (I still do time and again) but I mean I REALLY used to want friends. And I felt like the people in my church didn't really like me and didn't exactly want to be MY friend. So I went searching elsewhere, in the world. And I did end up finding friends there. "Best" friends. All of which dragged me down, and I participated in sin with them, and none of which I am even still friends with. Was it worth it? Not at all, cause I didn't even use our friendship to witness, just to feel better about myself. It might be fun while it lasts but I urge you not to stop looking for good, accountable Christian friends!

Worst Case Scenario...

"What about me? I live the the middle of nowhere and the church that I go to is full of old people, and there are no Christians at my school, who am I suposed to share everything with then?"

Well every period of life isn't going to be perfect. God appoints a season for everything. If you have a best friend, you know the feeling of walking into a room or store with her and how you know that even if something embarasing happens, she's got your back. Or if you need an honest opinion on an outfit she will give it. It's great. But if you simply don't have anyone right now to be your best friend (rememeber, your accoutable, christian friend who shares your values -very important I can't stress enough) if you don't have someone who can do this then I would encourage you to let God be your best friend! It might sound cheesy but it's actually best! I don't think that if you DO have a best friend then you shouldn't still keep God as your best friend, I just mean that it's actually easier to focus on your relationship and your FRIENDSHIP with God if He is all you have to fall back on. You can share everything with God, He already knows your secrets, He just wants to hear you tell Him. If you have God as your very best friend, you'll never be alone anymore. You'll still want friends, yes, that's inevitable. But When you're closest with God, you will know what kind of friends He wants you to find, and He can show you where to find them. It might be somewhere you'd never think to find them. Or right under your nose.

So here it is:

-Be friendly to the world, but NOT best friends

-If you have no friends let God act be your best friend. He loves you most. (He should be your best friend anyways)

-God can show you the perfect friends for you, cause they'll be meant to be. Literally!

-Don't run to the world to fit in better whatever you do! It's so much better NOT to fit in

"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." -Romans 12:2